Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
Randomize
