hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
Unless your apartment has 3 am pancakes Im not coming over.
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
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