Kiss
Puke
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
The bouncer said he wanted to but BBQ sauce on my legs. That Mystic tan has already paid for itself.
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Just got shoved by an Elvis impersonator. Evidently it isn't cool to ask how much of a disappointment they are in the eyes of their parents.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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