we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Time flies when you're blacked out in a lake
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
Randomize
