...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
i finally decided to cut him off after he he looked me dead in the eyes and said "how have i been inside you for the past twenty minutes when my pants are still on?"
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
Randomize
