He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Text me right after you finish, I want to know how the ghetto fleshlight worked out
How about I just call you while I'm doing it so you can hear my reaction?
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Randomize
