not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
how many times have i told you.. they dont like when you laugh during sex
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
