yeah she is the one who tells people i beat girls.. which ironically make me want to punch her in the face
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
there was a trapeze. enough said
had to check his id this morning to remember his name.... i was wayy off
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Randomize
