so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Blow job season was short but glorious.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize
