I'm already going to be stripping so like pretty much you would just be watching me. Also we're watching twilight. again.
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Today needs to die. The mail delivery guy watched me throw up in my yard while taking my chihuahua out in Christmas pajamas at noon. Low point in my life.
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
