Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
He called me piss drunk at 7:30pm while cooking bacon and said he was going to bed. I don't think he's taking it well.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
After tacos, we're chasing women.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
Randomize
