They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
Steve just broke his bong and some kid in an american flag bathing suit and no shirt just fell down the stairs. Its dangerous here
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
I have fence marks all over my body
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Randomize
