birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Why even have a ground level apt if you're not gonna let me climb out the window? I hate walk of shaming in front of toddlers...
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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