He asked to "fluff my boner.."
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Randomize
