Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
Fuck appropriateness.
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
Randomize
