Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
Randomize
