she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
So now I know what having sex while surrounded by chickens feels like.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
