She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
