batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
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