I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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