I'll bet she douches with gravy.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
