her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
