You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Hung over and there is no way in the world I can make this mess look good today. Only solution is to stay drunk.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Randomize
