I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
there was a keg and pinata at my uncles funeral, and a bunch of scary looking biker dudes showed up to pay their respects. i need to strive to be more like him.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
Randomize