I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
It was terrible. I am sore from head to toe, neither of us got off, and we were at it for an hour and a half, I faked having a heart episode so we could stop. It worked.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
Randomize
