I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
Tornado booty call.. dedication
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
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