I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
just walked past a group of stoners who were staring open jawed in the spice aisle. tonight they will stumble upon something amazing.
He told us that was the only place he could get service when we found him in the closet passed out with a beer
Yeah he had his two razors labeled "face" and "pubes". Should I be disgusted or impressed?
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
now were playing what girl doesnt belong in the picture of girls in bikinis.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
