Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
You were discovered in a bush, smoking, and singing "in the jungle" to yourself. Which explains the scratches, but not the orange paint.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
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