I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
my tampon string is in my asshole... do you think i can get it out without anyone noticing?
i'd get off the bar first.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Randomize
