in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
Trying to figure out what I just puked. Demon weed is salad. No more drunk buffets.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
