I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
OH YEAH AND FORGOT TO THANK YOU FOR THE lack of WARNING THAT HE WASN'T CIRCUMSIZED.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
Randomize