oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Well I found out I was essentially dumped and replaced by a hipster and apparently offered a girl $95 to go out with me. In the spirit of the Olympics I will not be spending any time on the medal stand.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
You will be reminded everyday when you witness my majestic mustache.
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