on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
walking home from your place the other day I saw a man with a ponytail sitting on some church steps petting a plant
he should get drunk with us
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Just woke up bloody and clutching a rear view mirror I'm pretty sure is from my car. For those of you keeping score at home this is why I stopped drinking four loko.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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