When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
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