i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I'm good. We walked you back to my apartment and you demanded to eat the sandwich I made for him
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
I just have to point out that once I typed "fa" my phone filled in "fatass"
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
When is the right time to ask your new roommate for her school schedule so she doesn't walk in on you fucking some rando in the kitchen in the middle of the afternoon?
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Randomize
