As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
Nothing says "Hello, Adulthood!" quite like receiving a dick photo at 11AM from a guy you haven't heard from since fifth grade.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize
