She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
Randomize
