i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
My psychiatrist just sent me a dick pic
Randomize