Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
my stepmom is let-the-dog-eat-out-of-her-mouth drunk. oh my god.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
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