of course. lets lasso hookers.
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Where was Alyssa when you were sniffing the bouncer?
Passed out on some guy who looked like someone from Duck Dynasty.
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
