Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
Lowest moment of my life just occurred. I literally threw up all over myself in front of my parents.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
Throwing up in the car while my mom drives, sister holds the bag & my dad holds my hair. This is how my family bonds.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
