She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
Three things I need a picture of: your friend, your bong, and your dick.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
I guess that's what I get for clicking on a link that says clown penis.
I like how she'll post a picture on Instagram with her boyfriend and 2 hours later you'll send me a snap of her panties on your rear view mirror
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Im crossing my legs while on the toilet. It's like I'm unconsciously thinking "if im going to barf and shit at the same time, Im at least going to do it LIKE A LADY"
Randomize