i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I woke up naked with a $20 bill taped to my titty, so I must of had fun.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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