How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I'm pretty sure at any given moment you could wring out my liver and get a couple of shots of jäger.
Like I cant decide if he's like autistic or something or just seriously cock blocks himself on purpose with this shit
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize