I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
Randomize
