Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
I know you are passed out now but when you wake up in the morning your keys are in the freezer and your probly gunna want to apologize to your gf...
alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
She made Precious look like a solid 6.5.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize