I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Randomize
