Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
I know. I'm a saint. Saint of sitting on faces.
Randomize
