i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
I can actually hear my brain cells scream as they die when she speaks.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I just woke up on the living room floor at my parents house. The last thing I remember was making a scene at Buffalo Wild Wings because our waitress "Sent the game into overtime" with a 0-0 score
No he can't come. I swear to gods he's "Why We Can't Have Nice Things" given physical form.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
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