Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
i also performed surgery on a chicken burrito from what i can tell from my scissors
Dad's drunk, trying to hook me up with a 43yo, and keeps saying one and done. Mom is on the verge of tears and disowning us. You missed a good birthday dinner.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
I love you man I just want to hold you and fuck you until you only know my name
I don't know who you are but HOW THE FUCK DID YOU GET MY NUMBER
Randomize
