If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
For someone I see at the bar by herself all the time... I should have know she had a tazer.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
Randomize
